Novel Bin Chapter 117: June 13th (Sunday) — Ayase Saki
Chapter 117: June 13th (Sunday) — Ayase Saki
Yuuta-niisan, Yuuta-niisan, Yuuta-niisan.
I chanted that three times in my heart before opening the door. It\'s become my routine of late.
"Good morning, Yuuta-niisan."
See, that wasn\'t so hard.
I could see Asamura-kun\'s top half from where I was across the dining room.
"Good morning, Saki."
Good morning, Saki.
My heart still raced a little every time he used my first name instead of my last. Still, I\'ve gradually gotten used to it, and lately, I think I\'ve been able to respond without getting too flustered.
It was the second day without our parents.
I often worry I might forget that we\'re siblings when we\'re alone together. Because, despite Asamura-kun and I also being lovers, we can\'t behave like regular couples do. Feelings like that tend to surface more when we\'re aware we\'re alone. But, given that we\'re siblings, we can\'t act like regular couples either.
…Well, that also raises the question of what regular couples even do.
Umm, hold holds? Hug? Kiss? Maybe even more than that—
—Yuuta-niisan, Yuuta-niisan Yuuta-niisan. I repeated it in my head like some kind of spell to keep the wild fantasies at bay.
I made it through yesterday without a hitch. Today started off well too. I\'ve got a good rhythm going, it seems.
"Oh, you\'ve already finished making the bento? That was quick," I said after seeing the lunch bag he\'d set on the table.
Now, what\'s inside, I wonder?
There was something in the groceries that hadn\'t been on the list I gave him. Sausages. The coarse ones with some seasoning in them. Asamura-kun seems to like spicy food, but they weren\'t labeled as spicy. It\'s doubtful they were for my Stepdad, Taichi-san, so likely they were in my bento.
I wanna try cute octopus-shaped sausages made by Asamura-kun!
No, no, I shouldn\'t expect too much. They might just be in there as whole sausages. It\'s his first time making a bento, after all. Still, I never expected him to make a bento for me, so I\'m really happy.
We sat down at the same table and ate the same breakfast as him. Rice, miso soup, and fried eggs. Asamura-kun\'s cooking repertoire may be limited, but everything tasted good. The miso soup, in particular, was just the right richness for me.
"Mmm, this is delicious."
He visibly relaxed as I said that. You don\'t need to be that tense, Asamura-kun; you always put a lot of care into the things you make.
We chatted about this and that as we ate. Asamura-kun snuck a quick glance at his smartphone.
"Rain and lightning in the afternoon..." he muttered.
I nearly choked on my rice.
I couldn\'t help glancing through the window behind him. The sky was blue, and the weather was nice.
"Rain… doesn\'t seem like it\'s going to, though?"
But according to Asamura-kun, there was a ninety percent chance of rain in the evening. That means... there\'s a pretty high chance of a thunderstorm.
"Be careful on your way home. It says there might be lightning too."
"Really? Ah, um… got it."
Did my face give it away? I didn\'t want him to know I was anxious.
I can handle rain. It just gets you wet. Lightning was a different story. The deafening booms close by make me feel like I\'m being yelled at. And lightning brings… blackouts. Which means darkness.
Not wanting to sour the mood after a delightful meal, I forcibly changed the subject.
***
With breakfast done, it was time for me to head to work, and Asamura-kun to cram school.
His classes started later, and since he cycles, he would usually leave an hour after me.
But, just as I opened the front door of our flat, I heard him call out to me.
"I\'ll go with you."
"Yuu—"
I started to say "Yuuta-niisan," but realized I was already halfway out the door. Normally, I\'d mentally repeat, from here on, it\'s Asamura-kun, three times before closing the door. But since my hand was already on the doorknob, I was stumped about how to address him.
First things first, I should step outside fully before turning around to face him.
"...What, Asamura-kun?"
"You don\'t have to be so strict about using different names—"
I knew he was right. I\'m too inflexible.
"Look, since it\'s supposed to rain today, I can\'t ride my bike. So I figured we might as well leave together."
Ah, I see. That makes sense.
The impending rain this evening wasn\'t the only reason, obviously.
I don\'t like being scrutinized for acting like a couple, but on the other hand, I also don\'t like being treated like a complete stranger by Asamura-kun. I can tell Asamura-kun knows that and tries to be considerate when we\'re outside, where our sibling roles don\'t apply.
Today, we just so happened to be going in the same direction. Unless someone we knew saw us leave the apartment building together, we could simply claim we ran into each other by chance.
After all, we\'ve shopped together at the local supermarket before.
Honestly though, I often think I can be a bit of a pain.
How do normal couples figure out the right distance between them? I\'d like to ask someone, but I\'ve never heard any of my acquaintances—especially boys—discuss their relationships. Well… to be fair, I don\'t actually have many acquaintances to begin with. For female friends my age, I\'ve got Maaya. But she doesn\'t really count. She\'s friendly to everyone, but she doesn\'t seem to have a boyfriend.
Lately, I\'ve been chatting with people like Ryouko Satou-san and Class Rep, but those conversations are... different.
I looked up at the sky as I stepped out of the apartment building. It was covered in dark clouds. It\'s going to rain, no doubt about it.
"By the time I get back from work, our parents will have returned, won\'t they?"
They said they\'d be back by nighttime.
My alone time with Asamura-kun was coming to an end. At least for now, let\'s just enjoy walking beside each other to the station. We set off in that direction.
It soon came time to part ways. We gave each other a small wave as we headed off to our respective destinations. Not too long ago, I wouldn\'t have been able to resist looking back at him as we parted. But today, I managed to resist and reached the bookstore without any such urge. Maybe changing the way I address him made a difference. I clenched my fist once, holding onto that tiny bit of satisfaction.
I quickly changed into my uniform and opened the door to the office.
There was a girl.
She was petite, with a cute swirl of hair on her head. A girl I hadn\'t seen before.
Who could she be? Someone related to the store?
I figured as much by the fact she was dressed in the same uniform as mine—not a school one, but the collared shirt and apron issued by the bookstore.
Could she be… a part-timer? She must be the new hire.
The girl tucked something into her apron pocket and looked up. As I thought, it was my first time seeing her. Oh right, she must be what\'s-her-name-san that Asamura-kun mentioned yesterday. The one who just joined.
Our eyes met. She smiled at me.
"Saki-senpai! You\'re Ayase Saki-senpai, right? Nice to work with you today!"
"Uh, ah, yes."
"Wow~, you really are beautiful!" she said, coming closer.
I flinched as her sparkling eyes fixed on me.
"Your hair is so bright and pretty! How many times did you bleach it? Which salon do you go to? It suits you so well, you look adorable... I mean, actually, you look like a model. You\'re stunning!"
The barrage of words left me dumbstruck.
Wh-what… What\'s happening?
Wait.
Did I even introduce myself? How does she know my name? I haven\'t even told her yet. And she just used my first name out of nowhere.
"Wow, wow, wow! You really are sooo beautiful!"
Wait, too close, too close, too close!
"U-umm…"
As I stood there, looking bewildered, the girl\'s expression turned to one of realization, and she quickly bobbed her head in apology.
"Ah, I\'m so sorry! I heard from the store manager that, \'The senpai helping you today is a beautiful lady.\' And then, well, I saw you, and you really are beautiful, so I thought... I wanted to be friends with you."
A beautiful lady... is she talking about me? It\'s nice to be called that, but the one in this store who better fits the description of "beautiful" is probably Yomiuri Shiori-san.
Besides, the girl in front of me was extremely cute herself.
She was quite short, probably shorter than Maaya. Her youthful face was accentuated by twin tails with red[1] inner highlights, which added a nice touch to her black hair. Her round eyes combined with everything else made her look just like a doll.
[Saki uses 赤 (red) to describe the color of Erina\'s highlights, whereas Yuuta uses the loan word ピンク(pink). Not sure why they see it as a different color.]
Her face still held hints of a junior high schooler\'s innocence, but both her hairstyle and clothes were trendy. She definitely had a good sense of style. She seemed to have a different taste in fashion than I do. Now that I think about it, Asamura-kun didn\'t mention anything about her appearance.
"Um… you\'re the new part-timer?"
"Yes. Um, nice to meet you, I\'m Kozono. Kozono Erina."
"Kozono-san."
Kozono Erina.
So she\'s the newbie Asamura-kun was talking about. She\'s in her first year of high school, I believe.
Oh, so the manager and maybe Asamura-kun must\'ve mentioned my name to her.
I shot a quick glance at Kozono-san. Uh, I should really act like a proper senpai here.
"Nice to meet you, I\'m Ayase Saki. Pleased to work with you."
As I bowed, Kozono-san rushed to follow suit.
"Same here! I look forward to working with you too!"
She doesn\'t seem like a bad person, I thought. But I wonder if we\'ll get along. She seemed overly familiar, and even if neither of us had any flaws, compatibility is still a thing. I was a little worried. I mean, I\'ve probably never met a girl quite like her before.
I took Kozono-san to the shelves, even though my shift hadn\'t started yet.
The manager had assigned me to train her. Honestly, I don\'t think I\'m experienced enough to train a new person, but I couldn\'t exactly say no when asked to do it.
Anyway, if the manager believed I could handle it, I should trust his judgment.
For now, I\'ll just pass on what I learned from Asamura-kun, Yomiuri-senpai, and the like. I don\'t mean in a bad way. It\'s more like passing down knowledge and experience. The best way to learn is by following good examples. In my opinion, that role model was Yomiuri Shiori-senpai, a favorite of the manager\'s. Asamura-kun was a close second.
Anyway, we made our way to the bookshelf near the store entrance where books were arranged in a stack.
Kozono-san pulled a small notepad and pen from her apron pocket.
Wow, she\'s well-prepared.
Come to think of it, whenever Asamura-kun had to remember something, he\'d use his phone as a substitute for taking notes.
That\'s when it hit me. The thing she put in her apron when I entered the office earlier was this notebook. Maybe she was reviewing what she learned yesterday. When I asked as much, Kozono-san smiled shyly.
"You saw that, huh? How embarrassing."
Maybe she\'s the type who doesn\'t want others to see her hard work? Like a swan that appears graceful on the water\'s surface but is frantically paddling underneath. I can fully understand the feeling of having a side of yourself you want to show and another you\'d rather hide.
"Um, have you been told about the layout of the shelves and stuff? How much did the person who taught you yesterday explain?"
"Oh you mean Asamura-senpai! He seemed super smart!"
"Huh? Ah, yeah, that Asamura-san guy told you."
Is "smart" really the first adjective that comes to mind for Asamura-kun? What about "kind" or something like that? Well, it\'s not wrong per se, so it\'s fine.
"Um, I was told about where everything is kept. Also, about the customer path."
"Ah, you mean the way customers move around? So you did get a brief explanation. We might go over some stuff you already know, but please bear with me, and let\'s double-check."
That\'s his way of teaching. Give a vague overview of everything to begin with, then go into detail later. It was originally Yomiuri-senpai\'s method.
Does that mean I can go into the nitty-gritty details now?
"So, this display you see right when you enter, is the new release section. You probably recognize a bunch of the books here."
"Yes. He said that since it\'s the first spot customers see when they enter the bookstore, that\'s where the bestsellers go," Kozono-san said as she nodded along.
"Exactly. Essentially, it\'s the bestsellers\' shelf. There are actually two types of books put here. The right side has featured new releases, and the left side has trending titles."
I raised one finger left and the other right to punctuate each point, forming a kind of peace sign.
"New releases are literally newly published books that are getting attention right now—this section only selects books by well-known authors. It\'s impossible to put out all the new releases."
I watched her scribble down some notes and nod along, before continuing.
"Trending books are just those that are popular in the industry or among readers. These days, some get popular because of social media. Like, business or self-help books can become trendy every now and then. So, they\'re not necessarily new releases. New releases are recent publications. Trending books are currently popular ones."
"Oh, I see. I understand," Kozono-san murmured and continued jotting things down.
Such a diligent girl. I waited for her pen to stop moving, then pointed at a book with a white cover in a corner of the display. Apparently she recognized it.
"Ah, I see that one in train ads every morning!"
The book, about human relationships, had a band around it that boasted, "Over one million sold in the series!" I\'ve rung it up at the register a few times myself.
"Books like this are popular, but they\'re not necessarily new releases."
"Really? It looks new, though."
That\'s because it\'s been reprinted recently.
"To find out the release date of a book, you look at the \'colophon\'."
I picked up the book and flipped to the last page.
"This is the colophon. Look at the date next to \'first edition.\' That\'s the date when this book was first published."
"Wow, ten years ago! Wait, is this a secondhand bookshop too?"
"No, it\'s not."
I couldn\'t hold back a wry smile.
Beneath the first edition date, the reprints are also listed. The date of the reprint is the date the current copy was issued. Books, when they get popular and sell out, are reprinted. The date of these reprints is listed accordingly.
"Heh, so this book has been popular all this time, has it?"
"It has been, yes. Of course, some books might not sell for ages, but then they\'ll suddenly gain attention and become popular."
"Huh, why\'s that?"
"Well, do you know that right now, there\'s this historical figure\'s autobiography that\'s getting a lot of attention again?"
I said the name of the person.
"That sounds familiar..."
His portrait was chosen to appear on the new banknotes.
"In cases like that, it sells even if it isn\'t a new release. \'Cause it\'s a topic of conversation."
"Now that you mention it, it\'s surprising how even old things can sell like that!"
I felt like facepalming at her innocent comment.
I mean, sure, in today\'s world where new things are constantly emerging, the old can get washed away in the relentless flow of the time. But that doesn\'t mean old things have no value. It might be because I love history, but I believe that if something is good, it remains good even if it\'s old. At least, that\'s what I think. I wonder if the younger generation feel the same way too.
...Wait, hold on a sec. I\'m only two years older than Kozono-san, so who\'s to say other first-year high school students don\'t feel the same way?
But my thoughts were wandering.
"So, basically, we have books here that customers would likely be interested in. It provides a reason for them to come into the bookstore."
"A reason… Oh, \'cause it\'s at the start of the \'customer path\'?"
"Yeah, that\'s right."
"It\'s just as Asamura-senpai told me! Once you understand the concept of the \'customer path\', you\'ll eventually get the layout of the shelves. It was a bit difficult though," Kozono-san said proudly, holding up her notebook.
She\'s a quick learner.
And, no surprise, Asamura-kun\'s teaching method was effective. I feel like I tend to go too much into detail.
But knowing how a bookstore as a retail store tries to attract customers should be a plus in the long run. Yeah, it shouldn\'t be a waste. It shouldn\'t.
Still, I\'d like to avoid overlapping with what Asamura-kun taught. Learning the same thing from different people is a waste of valuable training time. It\'s best avoided for the sake of both of us and the store.
"Kozono-san."
"You can call me Erina. Eri is fine too. Or even Eri-Eri!"
"Um, Eri... Kozono-san—"
It felt kind of awkward to suddenly use someone\'s first name when I don\'t know them well, so I just stuck to using her last name.
"—Can I ask what you learned yesterday?"
"Well, you see..."
While we were talking, a man tried to step around us to exit the store. He was holding a shopping bag, indicating he was a customer. Oops, we shouldn\'t be blocking the entrance like that. Especially if it inconveniences a customer.
I stepped aside and bowed.
"Thank you very much."
The man nodded in acknowledgment and left, and Kozono-san followed up with a bow of her own.
"Thank you very much!"
Her voice was so friendly and easy to understand, with just the right amount of warmth. It was probably better suited for customer service than my emotionless greetings. Plus, it sounded so natural.
I glanced at her. Kozono-san had a genuine smile on her face. Personally, I tried to maintain a soft expression, but I wasn\'t really smiling. It\'s not like I\'m against showing friendliness, I\'m just not good at putting on a fake smile. I\'ve practiced lifting the corners of my mouth many times, but I just couldn\'t get it to look natural.
Is it her innate personality that allows her to smile so naturally? Or maybe she\'s just trying really hard to be liked?
Argh, I almost let out a sound of realization. I get it now. Kozono-san\'s way of getting up close and personal might be her way of trying to connect with people. I was a bit surprised at first, but maybe she\'s just naturally suited for customer service.
"Um, Saki-senpai? Is something wrong?"
Oops. I got lost in thought.
"No, it\'s nothing. So, can you tell me what Asamura-san taught you? It\'s not very efficient if we cover the same topics."
"Understood! Let\'s see..." Kozono-san started saying as she flipped through her notebook.
The rest of the training went smoothly.
As the lunchtime crowds began to thin, Kozono-san and I decided to take our lunch break together.
The other staff kindly suggested that we eat together since we were close in age. With no reason to refuse, we both ended up eating in the office.
I said "Itadakimasu" and opened my bento box. I silently thanked Asamura-kun—who\'d made it for me—in my heart.
Lifting the lid revealed white, brown, and yellow: rice, sausages, and small cubes... probably potatoes.
Next, I reached for the Tupperware container. Salad. The colors were a vibrant green, white, orange, and red. Shredded lettuce, thinly sliced onions, julienned carrots, and cherry tomatoes. It\'s the exact same that I made yesterday. We do share recipes, so it\'s only natural. It\'s funny to feel our family bond in moments like this.
I drizzled dressing over the salad from the same tiny fish-shaped bottle that both Asamura-kun and I have. Though they were disposable, it felt special because they matched.
After letting a cherry tomato burst in my mouth, I ended my vegetable warm-up. Now, onto the main dish.
Sausages and potatoes cozily nestled against each other inside the bento. I started with a slightly rounded potato. Delicious. It tasted of consommé. Did he remember me mentioning that powdered consommé was handy?
He said not to get my hopes up, but it turned out great. Even the bite-sized sausages tasted good cold. While some meats can taste off when they cool and the fat solidifies, for some reason, sausages don\'t suffer the same fate.
I noticed that neither the sausages nor the potatoes had any grill marks, so they must\'ve been microwaved.
He must\'ve looked it up and did what he could manage. He really tried his best.
"Um..."
A voice brought me back to reality. Kozono-san, sitting across from me, was leaning forward.
"Is that a homemade bento?"
Her shining eyes were fixed on my chopsticks.
"Uh..."
I couldn\'t exactly say that Asamura-kun, whom she met yesterday, made it for me. Her bombarding me with questions would be tedious.
How about saying my boyfriend made it? Wait, no. That would imply that we lived in the same house. Living together, in other words. While we do technically live together, siblings sharing a house isn\'t actually "living together," is it? People don\'t say that, do they?
"My family made it for me."
It wasn\'t a lie, but not the whole truth either. I figured it was a decent excuse, but the moment I said it, Kozono-san looked like she\'d been bewitched by a fox[2]—no, seriously, that\'s the perfect way to describe it.
[Bewitched by a fox (kitsune ni bakasareta you ni) originates from Japanese folklore, where kitsune (fox-like creatures) are known for tricking and deceiving humans. It\'s used metaphorically to describe situations where someone\'s behavior changes unexpectedly, as if influenced by a kitsune\'s enchantment. The equivalent English saying would be, "Looked like they\'d seen a ghost."]
"Hmmm."
"What?"
"Hmm, hmm, hmm?. Maybe I\'m reading too much into it."
She tilted her head and started humming. What does she mean?
"Did I say something strange?"
"Well, you see, I ate lunch with Asamura-senpai yesterday, and his bento looked homemade too, so I asked him the same thing. Then, he was like, \'My family made it for me.\'"
I quite literally broke out into a cold sweat.
I made him lunch yesterday. Asamura-kun must\'ve been at a loss for how to answer too, and gave the same response I did.
"H-heh… oh really?
"If it were me, I\'d probably say \'Mama\'... no, not that! Ahem, I\'d specifically say, \'My mother\' or, \'My father,\' or whoever made it for me."
I thought so too. I almost said the same thing.
"Oh, by the way, my mother made this."
Kozono-san tilted her bento to show me. Her box, smaller than mine, was filled with colorful side dishes. The character-themed toothpicks stuck in it made it look cute.
"So I wondered why both Asamura-senpai and you used the phrase, \'my family\'... But maybe I\'m the weird one?"
"Oh, ha-ha-ha."
Then it hit me. My eyes darted to my bento. The salad in the container. He probably used mine as a reference, so the composition of the vegetables was identical. But that wasn\'t the only similarity. Although they\'re commonplace, the containers were the same design. Even our lunch bags were the same, just in different colors.
I quietly moved my lunch bag off the table to the seat beside me.
"Yeah, I think saying \'my family made it\' is pretty normal."
"Is it really? Ah, but I do think it sounds a bit more mature and quite nice."
"I\'m not so sure about that."
"Whaaat? Really?"
She laughed as if someone had pulled the rug out from under her. Her smile was just as genuine as the one she gave to the customer earlier.
"Speaking of family, do you have any siblings, Saki-san?"
"Uhm..."
Thinking about explaining it all over again was a big headache. And, I wasn\'t sure how Kozono-san would react to my response. Since I don\'t know, I\'d rather just avoid the topic entirely.
While I grappled with how to answer, Kozono-san directed her gaze upward and started muttering.
"Wait, I\'ll guess. I think you\'re an older sister, Saki-senpai, because you seem really responsible and cool. Hmm, but, just maybe you\'re actually a younger sister? You have an older brother or sister! And every day you act all sweet, calling him \'Onii-chan~\' and stuff! That kind of thing is what they call \'gap moe\'[3], isn\'t it? That\'s why I said \'just maybe\'."
[Refers to the appeal that comes from a character displaying a stark contrast between their usual personality or appearance and an unexpected or contradictory one. This contrast can make the character more endearing or charming to fans.]
What on earth is she going on about?
"I\'m… not sure how to answer that."
"Oh? Are you an only child?"
"Do you... really wanna know?"
"Not particularly."
What?
"I don\'t wanna know that specifically, just more about you, Saki-senpai."
What the...
"I just can\'t help but admire cool people who stand all tall and dignified, y\'know. Given how I am," she said, patting the top of her head with her palm.
Does she mean because she\'s small?
"I think you\'re cute, though."
"Wow! Thank you so much! But I still admire cool and dignified people."
With a beaming smile, Kozono-san returned to her lunch. She seemed content.
I, meanwhile, was sweating bullets internally.
What\'s this girl\'s deal?
At first, I thought she was a bit like Maaya—friendly and approachable. But she\'s different. Maaya, despite appearances, is good at reading the room. She\'s definitely friendly, but she\'s good at gauging what distance to keep just by talking a little. Take, for instance, the sports festival last year. Maaya didn\'t say anything to me when I skipped practice for it.
She\'s nosy, but she really pays attention to people, discerning whether they want company or to be left alone.
Kozono-san, in contrast, is quick to close the distance. She comes at you with such intensity you\'d think her life depended on becoming friends. It feels like she\'s not paying attention to the other person.
I don\'t think she means any harm, though. I remember the lingering animosity directed at me and Mom after the divorce. But this feels different.
She probably wanted to get to know me better and tried to expand the conversation. But I ended up forcibly shutting it down. I feel bad about it, but—
"Um... Did I upset you?"
My head snapped up in surprise. Kozono-san, with a character-themed toothpick in her mouth, looked genuinely apologetic.
"Did I mess up by asking about your family?"
She\'s surprisingly perceptive in some ways.
"It\'s not that... It\'s just... I\'m not very good at talking about that kinda stuff. I mean, hearing about me probably isn\'t all that interesting anyway."
"Hm... Okay, I get it. I\'ll drop it!"
"Thanks. Sorry."
"No worries!"
After that, we both ate our lunch mostly in silence, each of us engrossed in our phones until lunch break ended. Though our conversation was stilted, a part of me felt relieved that we didn\'t bridge the distance between us.
I closed the English listening video I was watching, got ready, and turned to Kozono-san.
"Should we get back to work soon?"
"Understood, Ayase-san."
I felt a sudden sense that something was off in the way she addressed me, but before I could pinpoint it, the hectic afternoon shift started.
***
I clocked out on my time card and finished my shift for the day.
I knew it\'d started to rain because every customer who came into the store had an umbrella. I was the one who\'d set up the umbrella bag stand at the entrance.
As soon as I stepped out of the building, I was buffeted by strong wind and rain blowing sideways.
I hurriedly opened my umbrella—only to panic when the wind almost whisked it away. Not good. I quickly ducked back inside the building to take shelter. Raining cats and dogs would be an understatement.
Looking up at the sky, I pondered my next move.
The only umbrella I had with me was a small foldable one, which didn\'t seem likely to withstand such strong wind and rain.
I\'d underestimated the forecast: ninety percent chance of rain with the possibility of thunderstorms. My bad.
People passing by on the street were gripping their umbrellas firmly from the base to avoid having them blown away.
Some were still occasionally caught off guard by strong gusts of wind, their umbrellas flipping inside out.
"This is... I\'m gonna get wet no matter what, aren\'t I?"
Even if I\'d brought a bigger umbrella, it probably wouldn\'t have made a difference. Heck, with how little I weigh, I might\'ve just been dragged away by the umbrella. There\'s always a silver lining, I suppose.
The rain showed no signs of letting up.
I clutched the sports bag I had slung over my shoulder tightly against me. I gripped the base of my umbrella, braced myself, and stepped out into the rain. I managed to stagger forward, despite feeling like my umbrella was about to fly away—and me with it.
The noise of the rain hitting my umbrella was so loud that even when I reached the bustling Shibuya main street, I couldn\'t hear any of the popular music. The rain had muted the usual hubbub of the city.
I began to hear faint sounds of thunder in the clouds above. Not a full-blown thunderclap yet, but enough to make me feel a little anxious and get my feet moving faster.
Soon, I saw the familiar apartment building up ahead. Ah, I\'m almost home. I ducked under the overhang by the entrance, snapped my umbrella shut, and finally let out a sigh of relief.
"Haah..."
Only my head and upper body had been somewhat shielded by the umbrella. The rain had soaked into my shoes, and the squelching sound whenever I took a step was unbearable.
I rolled up the folded umbrella and took the elevator up.
Finally managing to open the front door of our flat, I called out, "I\'m home," in a faint voice.
I set down my bag in the hallway, took off my shoes, then my socks, and stood there barefoot. I wanted to change into dry clothes ASAP.
I sensed someone behind the door and immediately froze. I was drenched from head to toe, and my clothes were clinging tightly to my body. My immediate thought was that I didn\'t want Asamura-kun to see me in such a sorry state. What should I do? As I was mulling it over, Asamura-kun, without opening the door, asked about the rain and mentioned that the bath was ready.
And, as if saying all he needed to, he walked away from the door.
"Thank you."
I wasn\'t sure if the tiny voice I managed to squeak out even reached the other side of the door.
I was careful not to drip water from my hair onto the floor, though I knew I\'d have to wipe up my wet footprints later. I also needed to stuff newspaper or some dry cloth into my shoes to help them dry faster.
Thinking about the hassle of cleaning up was discouraging. But a hot bath was waiting for me!
Back when it was just me and Mom, she\'d already be at work when I got home from school, so this was a new kind of luxury.
It\'s just what I wanted, so I\'m happy he thought ahead for me. I felt my spirits lift a bit as I made my way to the bathroom.
***
"Haaa..."
A sigh of relief escaped my lips.
My chilled body began to thaw in the hot water, the heating seeping into my every pore and warming me from the inside out.
I closed my eyes and let myself drift, the faint sound of the rain reaching my ears even in the bathroom.
Seems like it\'s getting heavier. There was thunder too. I just pray there\'s no blackout while I\'m in the bath.
Though I\'d managed to take a moment to relax, the storm made me so anxious that I washed up and soaked quicker than usual.
Dinner was already made when I stepped out of the bath. A delicious aroma wafted into my nose just by opening the door to the dining room.
I was grateful for Asamura-kun\'s thoughtfulness in choosing curry to warm me up.
I glanced out the window. Huh? The rain seems to have let up a bit. Maybe I came home when it was raining the hardest. That\'s kind of frustrating.
It was already dark outside though, so I couldn\'t actually tell the true state of the weather.
I wonder if Mom and my Stepdad are okay.
No sooner had I said that thought aloud, than my smartphone buzzed. A LINE notification popped up, and I could tell it was from Mom. She said they were stuck in a traffic jam and couldn\'t move.
Asamura-kun checked on his phone too, and it seemed that the storm had caused an accident and the subsequent traffic.
But, they won\'t be back until tomorrow—
Tomorrow is Monday, but will that be alright? Well, Mom starts work at night, so that should be fine. When I voiced my concern, Asamura-kun reassured me that my Stepdad, Taichi-san, had wisely taken paid leave tomorrow. So, I could relax.
Wait. Does that mean it\'s just me and Asamura-kun alone again tonight?
Well, that doesn\'t mean anything will be different, right? Right, we\'ll just take a bath, study, and go to bed.
Ah, actually, I\'ve already taken my bath.
So, the usual ritual of discussing who\'d have one first wasn\'t needed tonight. When I told him that, Asamura-kun looked a bit lost.
"As I was saying, since I\'ve already taken my bath…."
So Asamura-kun can—
No, that\'s wrong.
"You can go in whenever you want, Yuuta-niisan."
That was close. I\'d completely forgotten our usual routine when I came home soaking wet. Um, right, the person in front of me is Yuuta-niisan, Yuuta-niisan, Yuuta-niisan.
"And every day you act all sweet, calling him \'Onii-chan~\' and stuff!"
Why am I remembering that right now!? I won\'t say it, okay? Why do I have to act sweet anyway?
"Oh, by the way, I worked with Kozono-san today."
"Hm? Ah, so you did end up working with her."
Asamura-kun seemed confused by my sudden change of subject (though in my mind it was related), but soon picked up that I was talking about the new part-time girl.
I told him I\'d been assigned to train Kozono-san. Asamura-kun complimented her, saying she catches on quickly.
"Yeah... That\'s true," I replied hesitantly.
I guess because I was kind of vague, Asamura-kun looked worried and asked if something had happened.
"It\'s not that something happened. She\'s energetic and honest, so I think she\'s a good person. But… Sorry, I dunno how to put it into words."
Asamura-kun responded to that by saying, "I actually had the impression she might be similar to Narasaka-san."
Implying that they might get along.
At first, I felt the same, but—
Maaya is like a sunflower. She always turns her head to follow the movement of the sun. No, I\'m not saying something embarrassing like I\'m the sun or anything. What I mean is, she watches her counterpart and responds accordingly. That\'s why she has such a diverse group of friends.
She\'s friends with someone like me, socially awkward and high-maintenance—though it\'s a bit weird to say that about myself. And, she\'s also friends with outgoing, social butterflies. She has serious friends and not-so-serious ones. Maaya can interact with all these different personalities, adapting her behavior to each one.
As for Kozono-san…
Asamura-kun was right in saying she was an excellent new part-timer. She\'s polite and a quick learner. There\'s no doubt she\'s a great asset at work.
But her focus might not be others.
I recalled a moment when we were eating lunch in the office. Oh, right, when I said, "Should we get back to work soon?" she replied, "Understood, Ayase-san." Until then she called me "Saki-senpai." I\'m sure of it.
Why did she change how she addresses me? I don\'t know, and it bothers me.
***
After dinner, I locked myself in my room to study for entrance exams.
I wore headphones to block out the noise, but my concentration was broken when my smartphone\'s screen lit up. A LINE notification. I checked it to find a message in the group chat I was in with Maaya and Satou-san.
We\'d created this group to stay in touch during our school trip, when we shared the same room. It was the only LINE group chat I was in, aside from one for my family. Usually, we just message each other directly, so I don\'t really see the need to have group chats to be honest.
Anyway, this group chat hardly ever received any messages.
Maaya:[It flashed! It really flashed! Oh no, it\'s close!]
Saki:[Go to sleep.]
I shot back a short reply. Seriously, why is she messaging me for something like this? I wondered, but [Read] immediately popped up next to my message and another reply came quickly after.
Ryouko:[I\'m scared. You\'re not scared, Ayase-san? That\'s amazing.]
It was from Satou Ryouko-san.
"Ah."
It finally clicked. So that\'s what Maaya is trying to do.
This must be Maaya\'s way of showing concern, knowing that Satou-san is a scaredy-cat. She probably thought she\'d be scared on her own. Instead of sending a direct message, which might make Satou-san feel like she\'s being fussed over, she used the group chat. Knowing you\'re not the only one who\'s scared can lessen your anxiety.
Well, usually.
Saki:[Is everyone ok?]
Maaya:[I\'m locked in my room, blasting music through my headphones! Shutting out the light and sound!]
Ryouko:[I totally get it.... Maybe I should listen to music too.]
Maaya: [You should~! It\'ll make you feel better~]
Ryouko:[Ok.]
The messages stopped for a second.
Ryouko:[Thanks guys. Really ??]
Reading Satou-san\'s sweet message with that smiling cat sticker made me feel warm inside. Maaya really is good at being thoughtful.
"I\'m not scared? Not true at all."
Truth is, I\'m terrified of thunderstorms. And the blackouts that often come with them. Apparently, not even Maaya realized I was scared as well. I left my room and made my way to the living room, flicking on the TV to check the weather report. On the Weather News channel, a female announcer was standing in front of a map scattered with thunderstorm icons. Captions were running in one corner.
"Watching the news?"
The voice made my heart leap. It was Asamura-kun. I was so absorbed in staring at the screen that I didn\'t notice him entering the room. The weather forecast was showing the transition of rainfall now.
"I think they\'ll be alright. Don\'t worry," Asamura-kun said after a brief exchange.
"About our parents? Nah, I\'m not worried about them."
Mom isn\'t scared of storms, and right now, she has my Stepdad Taichi-san by her side. So she\'d feel more at ease with him than with me.
I snuck a glance at Asamura-kun over my shoulder. It looked like he was about to take a bath.
He probably came to check on me when he saw the light in the living room. I didn\'t want to keep him from his bath any longer. Plus, staring at the TV and stressing out wouldn\'t exactly make the clouds simply disappear.
"I can make you something to drink if you like."
"I\'ll be up all night if I have coffee now. Besides, you were about to take a bath, weren\'t you? Don\'t worry about me. I can make it myself."
I stood up just as the last word left my lips.
Flash. An enormous clap of thunder shook my body, making me scream.
The lights went out.
Thrown into darkness, I instantly panicked. I crouched down, covering my ears with both hands. It was better to close my eyes so I couldn\'t see by my own choice, rather than open them and see nothing. That way, it was my fault that I couldn\'t see.
"Ayase-san!"
A voice shouted as if it was near my ear, but I barely heard it.
He gently held my shoulder. I looked up, opening my eyes, only to be blinded by another flash. Unable to bear it, I clung to Asamura-kun in front of me.
No more! I can\'t take it!
I clenched the cloth I\'d grabbed, closing my eyes tight as if determined never to open them again.
The booming sound of lightning made my heart constrict with fear. The sudden darkness was terrifying.
Asamura-kun tried to reassure me by saying it was only a blackout, but that did little to make me feel less frightened.
He said it was probably safer to sit down, so I let him lead me by the hand to the couch. Asamura-kun took a seat beside me.
"Look outside. Everything\'s pitch-black."
I reluctantly opened my eyes to see. Beyond the rectangular frame of the window, lightning flashed, and I could barely make out the shape of it. All the lights in the other buildings were out. Definitely looked like a widespread power outage.
I was still clinging to him. My hand, which had crawled to his chest, was gripping so hard it was creating creases on his shirt. Letting go was out of the question. I felt like if I didn\'t hold onto something, I\'d be left behind in this darkness.
Asamura-kun wrapped an arm around my back, gently stroking me with his palm. Although I felt embarrassed, being consoled like a little kid, the warmth from Asamura-kun\'s hand on my back was comforting. Slowly but surely, my overwhelming anxiety began to ease. But I couldn\'t bring myself to ask him to stop.
"Is it the lightning you\'re afraid of? Or the blackout?"
"...Both," I whispered, leaning into Asamura-kun\'s chest.
I told him I was sorry for clinging to him like a kid.
Asamura-kun whispered back to me in a warm voice, saying that everyone has things they\'re scared of. His embrace tightened ever so slightly, and I let out a relieved sigh, feeling comforted.
"I\'m not going anywhere. I\'ll stay right here with you," he whispered soft but clear in my ear.
His gentle, yet firm reassurance melted away my stubborn anxiety, like calming down a kid who\'d been crying.
"Is there anything you\'re afraid of, Asamura-kun?"
I wondered how Asamura-kun could be so calm even when suddenly thrown into the darkness. Maybe he\'s not scared of anything.
Surprisingly, though, he admitted that he did have ordinary fears. But he said he was unfazed by darkness or ghosts, so maybe he has a slightly different view on things than most people.
Probably to calm me down, Asamura-kun spouted some weird logic and continued chatting to me.
As I started to calm down a bit, something dawned on me.
When I freaked out, Asamura-kun had shouted, "Ayase-san!" He was so frantic that the promise to use my name at home had flown out the window. But maybe that was for the best. His familiar tone might\'ve been what reached me.
With the air-con off, all I could hear was the wind and rain. The sound of thunder was slowly fading away, but the electricity was still out.
To distract myself from the storm, I began recounting a childhood memory. The reason why I became afraid of the dark.
I felt embarrassed, admitting to such a childlike fear. I didn\'t often share my fears with others, but for whatever reason, I wanted Asamura-kun to know. I wanted him to know because it was him.
He listened to me stammer my way through my story until the end.
He said it was commendable for someone to open up about their fears.
Is that really true?
"Even though I panicked and clung to you?"
Asamura-kun joked that he might\'ve acted stubborn and pretended not to be scared if it were him.
The image of a stubborn young Asamura-kun insisting, "I\'m not scared" popped into my mind, and I couldn\'t help blurting, "That would\'ve been kinda cute."
He seemed a little embarrassed to be called cute, though.
"Well, luckily for you, I\'m not afraid of either the dark or lightning. So, you can always rely on me in times like this."
Yeah. Thanks.
I was really happy earlier.
"The thing you said. That you wouldn\'t go anywhere. That you\'d stay with me."
He replied with a playful, "Well, I\'m glad," and a hint of embarrassment.
Asamura-kun pulled his smartphone out of his pocket and put it on the coffee table in front of the couch.
With practiced movements, he pulled up Lofi Hip Hop. The scratchy sound echoed softly in my ears, drowning out the noise of the wind and rain.
[Maybe I should listen to music too.]
[You should~! It\'ll make you feel better~]
My chat with Satou-san and Maaya earlier popped into my head. Yeah, you were right, you two. I\'m not as scared anymore.
"Let\'s forget about the blackout. Don\'t you think it feels kind of stylish and elegant listening to the rain and this music?"
My lips naturally curled into a smile at his slightly pretentious way of speaking. And I almost burst out laughing listening to Asamura Yuuta the poet, only able to suppress my laughter by burying my face in his chest. No, stop, stop, it\'s too funny.
I lost myself in the warmth of his chest and the arms holding me. All I could hear was the muffled sound of music playing.
Closing my eyes, I felt like I could forget that I was in our flat in the middle of a blackout, a storm raging outside. I could almost see a garden of hydrangeas blossoming in the rain behind my closed eyelids.
My heartbeat slowly synchronized with the steady rhythm of Asamura-kun\'s. I let go of the shirt I was holding and placed my hand atop his on the couch. Intertwining our fingers, I lifted my head and whispered to him ever so faintly, "Hey…"
Just then, the ceiling light flicked on.
I heard the hum of the air-con, and noticed that lights in the buildings outside were also turning on one by one.
The blackout was over. It felt like I was waking up from a dream.
A message came in from Mom on LINE. She said the rain had stopped and she\'d hurry home as soon as possible. I didn\'t know how soon, "As soon as possible" would be, but if she was already close by, it might not take long.
"It\'s a shame. Our stylish and elegant moment is over."
My fear of the dark hadn\'t disappeared. If I\'d been alone, it would\'ve been neither stylish nor elegant. But I was so grateful for Asamura-kun\'s companionship that I just had to tell him.
"Another time, then," he said.
Another time. Like this, with just the two of us.
Yeah, maybe. But not in a thunderstorm. Not in complete darkness. I\'d like at least some light. Like on Halloween.
But—someday. A day when I can finish what came after that "Hey..."
"Yeah. Well then, goodnight."
…Because I couldn\'t say it. Not yet.
"Yuuta... niisan," I said, as if seeking confirmation.
"Goodnight, Saki," he dutifully replied.
Yeah, when I get used to being called "Saki." When it feels strange to be called "Ayase-san," I\'ll try again.
And just like that, the two days without our parents, for me and Asamura Yuuta, came to an end.